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Thursday, 12 June 2014

Hospital Transfer, Baby Shower and so much LOVE!

It has been a very eventful week to say the least...

Let’s start off with a little update on the kids...

Sawyer - This little man has pretty much 100% resolved his respiratory issues that he was struggling with and has had substantial improvement over the past few days. The only thing he needs to continue to work on is his feeding now. This little guy is getting tuckered out really easy and feeding consistently has been a slight challenge for him. He’s working his best so he can come home at the same time as his sister Jordyn.. He is co bedding with Jordyn now, which we love so much. They spent 34 weeks together and I know they were missing each other so it’s so special to see them together again. 

Jordyn - What can we say about little Ms Jordyn... She’s such a strong little lady, her strength amazes her daddy’s every day. Jordyn has been very alert these past few days and we constantly get lost in her beautiful eyes. Her looking up at us with such purity and innocence is something that we treasure so much. We sit there studying each other’s faces and taking in every moment we have together. Jordyn and Sawyer’s lives will be full of love, laughter and adventure when they come home. They will have two daddy’s that will love and commit everything they have to there happiness and well-being and they have an amazing community of friends and family that will love and support them every step of the way. These two little ones are so blessed to have you all and so are we.

Not having our kids home with us has been a bit of an emotional obstacle that we have been working on together to ensure that we both stay level and positive. We have been very strong through this all, but I had a bit of an emotional break this past Sunday night. I think it was a combination of everything that had happened leading up to Sunday... I laid in bed and the tears started flowing. All I could picture in my head was Jordyn and Sawyer.. I know how connected I am to them and I know how I feel when we are apart so my heart ached knowing that they could be feeling the same way. I felt like I was abandoning them by not being there every moment... While I know this is not the case the mind can do silly things when your highly emotional and on very little sleep. Being a dedicated father and husband has become my sole priority in life and that encompasses a lot of new responsibility. I am feeling ready and excited for whatever comes my way and know that the bound that Brett and I have together and now with our children,  this will allow us to achieve beautiful things together as a family.

Let’s talk a little bit about our Baby Shower.... WOW.... I can’t even begin to express what an amazing experience this was.. My heart was filled with so much love by all the support we have received and the out pouring of love we got at our shower. We had people coming from all over the Okanagan and Lower Mainland to share this special day with us. We had over 100 people join us and we filled our Friend Toni and Dave’s restaurant to celebrate Jordyn and Sawyer. For those of you who joined us, thank you for sharing this day with us. While we may not have had as much time to spend with each person it was so special to see this out pouring of love and support. And to the Ladies who spent countless hours planning and organizing our shower, from the bottom of all our hearts we thank you for making one of the most heartwarming experience yet. Love you all so much...

As many of you know Jordyn and Sawyer were transferred to a hospital closer to home which is so nice because the long drives where really adding up on us. It was a bitter sweet moment for us for many reasons. We developed a "Family" at Royal Columbian Hospital with all the staff in the NICU and they made our journey into parenthood so amazing. They helped us understand everything every step of the way and involved us in any way they could. We also found out that the Royal Columbian NICU is underfunded for equipment which was so heartbreaking knowing the importance of the work they do. We recently had a very lovely lady send us a message and let us know that she was going to send a donation to the Royal Columbian NICU in Jordyn and Sawyers name. This touched our hearts so much that someone who does not know us directly would make such a beautiful gesture in our children’s name. Brett and I have talked and we will be looking at some sort of fundraiser campaign in the near future with all funds raised going to the Royal Columbian NICU.. So we will keep you posted. But in the meantime... If anyone is looking to make a worthy donation to a department that impacts families from across the province please consider "Royal Columbian NICU". The money they raise goes towards equipment to keep these sweet little angel healthy and safe.

Now back to our hospital transfer... Initially things went good, but within a day we got caught up in a bunch of policy red tape... As mentioned before Brett and I had all of our legal paperwork done ahead of time to avoid any issues once the babies arrived.. Royal Columbian was fantastic with all of this information and never once made us feel like we were "Secondary Parents". This all started when the social worker contacted Raylene and advised she needed to sign some forms one being a form to authorize Brett and I to see our own children... Once Raylene shared this with me my heart sank to the bottom of my stomach... I could not comprehend why we would need authorization as we had all the legal paperwork in place and had no issues at the previous hospital. Some may know that in April 2013 the law and process changed for couples conceiving children through surrogacy. It has now become a lot easier for intended parents if they have filed all the appropriate paperwork with a lawyer and that is exactly what we did. Unfortunately the Social Worker involved was not familar with the new law changes, which was surprising to us both. When we tried to educate her and provided her with all the required information she continued to push back and was not willing to understand that what she was doing was incorrect and that we had done everything to avoid what she was trying to pull. She even went as far to interrupt us from bathing our children for the first time and was telling Brett that we will not be able to make medical decision on our children as all the proper paperwork had not been filed and that we needed to go to court to get things processed before we could be fully recognized as Sawyer and Jordyns sole parents.

As anyone could imagine Brett and I were extremely upset about this as this woman was making uneducated claims and had no idea what she was talking about. We escalated this to her supervisor and involved our lawyer and things are now getting resolved. This Social Worker came down today again and let Brett know that she was not aware of the changes in the law and after speaking with our lawyer now understands what needs to happen and was going to reverse the mess she was making. While this is great news, she will never be able to undo what she said and how she made us feel and on top of it all she could not even apologize for the upset she caused. The silver lining in this all is now this hospital now knows how to deal with surrogacy and no other family will have to feel the way we did. At the end of the day this was just a case of someone not doing their homework before injecting themselves into a family’s life.. So the good news now is everything should be resolved by days end and we will not have to feel any less involved moving forward. While this was not a great experience I can not say enough great things about the NICU nurses here. You are all universally amazing. Both hospitals have been absolutely incredibly . So much care and they have always been so supportive of us and our family. Of any of you are reading this, we LOVE you and you have all equally made such a positive impact on all of our lives! 

Thank you again for everyone who has been following us, we continue to get messages from all around the world and surpassed 10000 views in 36 hours on our last post alone. The purpose of this blog is to share our story with you all but also to provide hope to other couples out there wanting the same in life. My words to you “Never give up on what’s most important, no matter the obstacles that come along with the right support you can overcome anything”

Chat soon my friends...