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Saturday, 9 November 2013

Being Gay in the middle of BC's Bible Belt

This was a huge concern for me and really could have put a wedge in Brett and I's relationship. I grew up in the "City" and was working in DT Vancouver when we met,  one of the most Gay friendly city's in the world and then I meet this "corn chucking" Chilliwack boy who has no interest in city life. We dated for about 6 months before I ended up moving out to Chilliwack. We rented a nice condo "DT" as I honestly thought I was going to be able to convince Brett to move out to the city. I soon realized that this was not going to happen so we bought a townhouse a year later. We lived in this for a year and could not handle strata life so we sold and bought a house around the corner in a new development. It was a home that we could grow in and we put in a beautiful suite for my mom. She moved out here and started a family business with us which is now very successful! It is very nice to have my mom so close as a close relationship with our children is very important to me as I had with my grandparents. 

Back to being a gay couple in the Bible Belt... Prior to moving to Chilliwack I had never been to Chilliwack. I had the perception that all "religious" people where a "certain" way and I quickly learned I was sooo sooo wrong about this place I now call home. This community of 90000 people showed me everything I was not expecting. We have made incredible friends that love us for us and support our rights as an equal couple. We are both employed by large influential companies in our community and we are treated no different then married Bob and Joanne.

I have found out over time that some of our friends are in fact religious and have strong christian/catholic beliefs. This is the part that really showed me how society is evolving on both sides... I had this perception of religious people and what they were all about and many religious people had this perception of what gay people were about. I quickly learned with open minds and open hearts we can let go of what we "believe" is true and allow us to "see" what is actually true. Our community has evolved to open there hearts to good kind hearted people no matter there sexual orientation and we have allowed ourselves to remove our barriers that prevented these genuinely great people into our lives. Many of our friends have small children too and they are teaching there kids tolerance and acceptance that will pave the way to a beautiful world that we can all share together. 

Brett is also an avid Baseball player and a great one at that. When he told me he played baseball I questioned if I should come watch him play.. "Do they know he's gay" "How would they react to me" "Will they treat Brett differently"? To my surprise many people knew Brett was gay however he never really had a BF at his game regularly in the past. I started coming to his games and quietly sat on the bench not knowing what to expect.. Then rolls in our now very close friend Lucy... She took me in under her wing, taught me everything I needed to know about baseball and showed me how to score keep for the team! Over time I got to know Brett's team more and started building great friendships with his teammates with some now being great friends of ours. I also started to get a chance to meet other teams at the local tournaments and Brett has never been shy about introducing me as his "Partner". To my surprise again, welcomed and treated no different then anyone else there. I could not have been more wrong about how I thought my life would be in Chilliwack and I am very grateful for that. 

We all have the opportunity to surround ourselves with good solid people and that is what we have connected ourselves with. I know there are people out there that do not agree with our lifestyle and the idea of two men raising a child together.. Do we care? No, not the slightest bit! We will love, nurture and provide for our children to the fullest and they will always be surround by u